A Picture I Drew, with Apologies to xkcd

A transcription of the text, for those of poor eyesight:

-Let's get more booze!
-That is a good idea.

Later...
barf ->
<- cutaway of kitchen sink

The Person Who is Hardest on You is Yourself, Including Massage Parlour Employees

I'd give you the shirt off my back
just not this one
I'd show you the formula
and no method

I'd be in your musical revue
but I'd lip-sync
I'd act in your one act play
as a tree

When you get right down to it
I'm no good

I'd make you coffee
from crystals
I'd pass you the cream
it's Coffee Mate^TM

I'd give you cocaine
just one line
I'd wash your feet
with spit

When you get right down to it
I'm no good

No happy ending